It's the question none of us want to ask ourselves. The one that keeps you awake at night, breaks your heart and makes you feel like you're betraying the one who has given you years of unconditional love.
Is it time to say goodbye to your dog?
We are Yilenia and Azucena, veterinarians and pharmacists with 22 years of experience, and founders of FuneralVet. We have accompanied hundreds of families at this time and have personally experienced the loss of our own colleagues.
This article will not give you a magic answer. Because it doesn't exist. But we will give you the professional and emotional tools so that you can take the right decisions. the most difficult decision with the greatest possible peace.
The question that no one wants to ask but we all need to answer
We have been in the veterinary sector for more than two decades. We have seen families waiting for "one more day", and we have seen others who went ahead out of fear. Both situations hurt in different ways.
The truth is that there is no such thing as a perfect moment. But there are clear signals that your dog is giving you, and your responsibility as his family is to listen to them.
Your dog has taken care of you emotionally for years. He has waited for you every evening, comforted you when you cried, slept at your feet protecting you. Now it is your turn to take care of him, even if it means letting go.
The 7 signs you shouldn't ignore
As veterinarians, we assess your dog's quality of life through several key indicators. It's not just "does he eat or doesn't he eat". It goes much deeper.
1. Unmanageable pain
Signs of chronic pain:
- Complains when getting up or lying down
- Constantly limps or fails to support a leg
- Prevents you from touching certain areas of the body.
- Breathing is rapid even at rest
- Constantly changes its posture in search of relief
Chronic pain not controlled with medication is one of the clearest signs. If painkillers are no longer working, your dog is suffering more than he deserves..
2. You have lost interest in what used to make you happy.
Your dog always ran towards the door when you took the lead. Now he doesn't even raise his head.
He used to jump for joy when you came home. Now he barely looks at you.
When a dog loses interest in his favourite moments, he is telling you something very important: that the effort to enjoy is greater than the joy he feels.
3. Cannot perform his or her needs with dignity
Occasional incontinence is one thing. But when your dog:
- He poops himself and doesn't even seem to notice
- Cannot get up to relieve himself
- He lies in his own urine and faeces.
- Shows shame and sadness at their situation
This is not just a hygienic problem. It is a loss of dignity that no one who has loved you so much deserves to live with..
4. Has stopped eating or drinking
We are not talking about a day of little appetite. We are talking about:
- Refuse even favourite food for several days
- Show no interest even for prizes or trinkets
- Drinking too little water or not drinking at all
- Losing weight in a highly visible way
Prolonged poor appetite is the body telling you it is shutting down.. Force feeding only prolongs their suffering.
5. More bad days than good
This is the golden rule we use with families:
If your dog has more bad days than good days in a weekThe time has come to seriously consider saying goodbye.
Ask yourself honestly:
- How many days this week have you really enjoyed?
- How many days has it suffered or has it just existed?
- Am I prolonging his life for him or for me?
This last question hurts. But it is the most important.
6. His look has changed
After 22 years of accompanying animals, we have learned to read their looks.
When a dog is ready to go, his look changes. There is no more spark. There is no more curiosity. There is only deep weariness.
It is as if he is saying to you: "I am very tired. I have already fulfilled my mission with you. Let me rest.
7. Your vet has told you "that's all there is to it".
If your trusted vet, who has known your dog for years, tells you that there are no more therapeutic options to improve his quality of life, listen to him.
Veterinarians love animals as much as you do. If they suggest you consider euthanasia, it is because they know it is the last act of love you can give them.
The HHHHHMM scale: a professional tool for you
Dr Alice Villalobos, a world-renowned veterinary oncologist, created a scale to assess quality of life in animals. It is called scale HHHHHMM (for its acronym in English).
Rate from 0 to 10 each of these aspects of your dog's life:
H - HURT (Pain)
Is your dog in pain, is it controlled with medication, is it breathing normally?
- 0-3: Severe uncontrolled pain
- 4-7: Moderate pain with treatment
- 8-10: Pain free or well controlled
H - HUNGER (Hunger/Appetite)
Does he eat on his own, does he need stimulation, does he refuse food altogether?
- 0-3: Does not eat even with stimulation
- 4-7: Eat with assistance or encouragement
- 8-10: Eat normally
H - HYDRATION (Hydration)
Does he drink water on his own, is he dehydrated, does he need fluid therapy?
- 0-3: No drinking, severe dehydration
- 4-7: Drinks little, needs help
- 8-10: Drink normally
H - HYGIENE (Hygiene)
Can he keep himself clean, does he control his bladder and bowels, does he soil himself constantly?
- 0-3: Total incontinence, can't wipe himself.
- 4-7: Occasional incontinence
- 8-10: Controls sphincters
H - HAPPINESS (Happiness)
Does it respond to stimuli, does it show joy, does it interact with the family?
- 0-3: Apathetic, emotionally unresponsive
- 4-7: Responds slightly to some stimuli
- 8-10: Enjoy, play, interact
M - MOBILITY
Is he/she able to move without assistance, does he/she need support, is he/she completely prostrate?
- 0-3: Unable to move or in great pain
- 4-7: Moves with difficulty or assistance
- 8-10: Moving normally
M - MORE GOOD DAYS THAN BAD
How many good days does your dog have in a week?
- 0-3: Almost every day is a bad day
- 4-7: Balanced good and bad days
- 8-10: Most days are good
Interpretation of results:
Total sum of more than 35 points: Your dog still has an acceptable quality of life.
Sum between 20-35 points: It's time to talk seriously to your vet about your options.
Sum of less than 20 points: Your dog is probably suffering more than he enjoys. It's time to consider a dignified farewell.
"But he still recognises me" - why this is not enough
This is the phrase we hear most often: "But he still recognises me when I come home".
We understand you perfectly. It is heartbreaking to think that your dog still loves you and you are going to make the decision to let him go.
But recognising you does not mean that I am not suffering.
Your dog has loved you unconditionally for years. He would do anything for you, even endure unbearable pain just to see you come home for another day.
Is that the gift you want to give him in exchange for his love?
The question is not, "Do you still recognise me? The question is: "Do you have quality of life and do you enjoy more than you suffer?
The burden of guilt: "What if I'm getting ahead of myself?"
This is the second most common phrase: "What if I'm getting ahead of myself? What if I could have lived another week?"
Listen to us carefully, because this is important and this is what we are dealing with in our Bereavement Unit:
It is better to leave a day earlier than a day later.
If you say goodbye to your dog when he still has a little dignity, when he is not yet suffering unbearably, you are giving him the gift of a peaceful death.
If you wait too long, your dog may:
- Suffering extreme pain
- Completely lose their dignity
- Having a respiratory crisis
- Convulse in front of you
- Dying alone and scared in the middle of the night
Which memory would you rather have: that of a peaceful farewell where you tell him how much you love him, or that of an agonising end that could have been avoided?
Euthanasia is not "killing" your dog - it is releasing him from suffering.
The word "euthanasia" comes from the Greek: "eu" (good) and "thanatos" (death). It literally means "good death"..
It is not killing. It is liberating.
It is the last act of love you can give to someone who has loved you without asking for anything in return for years.
What the process is really like
We explain it to you in full transparency, because we believe that knowing the process will help you make your decision:
- Prior sedation: Your dog first receives deep sedation. He falls asleep in your arms in 2-3 minutes. It's like when he falls asleep on the couch. That's the last thing he feels: your warmth, your smell, your voice.
- Final process: When he is completely asleep (feels absolutely nothing), the vet gently administers the medication for his heart. Your dog feels no pain. He feels no fear. Only peace.
- Farewell: You can stay with him as long as you need to. Hug him, talk to him, thank him for all the years of love.
Your dog leaves without suffering, surrounded by love, feeling your warmth until the last moment.
Testimonies of families who made this difficult decision
Laura and her Golden Retriever "Thor".
"Thor was 14 years old and had been fighting cancer for months. The last few days he couldn't get up anymore, he didn't eat, and his eyes told me he was very tired. We decided to say goodbye at home, with FuneralVet. Yilenia and Azucena came, Thor fell asleep in my arms without pain, and finally stopped suffering. It broke my heart, but I know it was the right thing to do. I gave him the peace he deserved after 14 years of unconditional love."
Manuel and "Luna".
"Luna was my shadow. She was my everything. When the vet told me that her kidney failure had no solution and that every day was suffering, I didn't want to hear it. But Luna was no longer Luna. She no longer played, she no longer ate, she just existed. The day we said goodbye at FuneralVet, with all the respect and affection in the world, I felt that I had finally done something good for her. I gave her the dignity she deserved".
Carmen and her family
"Making the decision to euthanise Toby was the hardest thing we have ever done as a family. But when Yilenia explained the quality of life scale to us, it became clear that Toby had more bad days than good. He left surrounded by all his family, in peace, and we were able to say goodbye as he deserved. FuneralVet accompanied us before, during and after. We never felt alone.
Questions that families ask us at this point:
"Will my dog know I'm going to put him to sleep?"
No. Your dog does not understand the concept of death as we do. He only knows that you are there, that you love him, and that he feels increasingly calm and tired.
The last thing he feels is your love, not fear.
"Do you suffer during euthanasia?"
No. The sedation is deep and fast. Your dog literally falls asleep in your arms like a nap. Afterwards, when he is completely asleep, the process continues without him feeling anything at all.
"Can I be present?"
Yes, and you should. At FuneralVet we always recommend that families are present. Your dog has been with you in your worst moments. You deserve to be with him in his.
Your presence gives him peace. Your voice gives him comfort. Your embrace gives him love to the end.
"What do I do with his body afterwards?
This is where our individual cremation service come in. You don't have to worry about any logistics. We take care of it with the utmost respect and professionalism.
You can choose:
- Individual cremation in person: Be present throughout the process
- Individual cremation: You receive his ashes in a personalised urn.
- Additional services: Thanatoaesthetics, farewell room, psychological support
Find out about all our services here.
"When will it be OK to get another dog again?"
When your heart is ready. There is no set time. Some people need months, some years, some weeks.
What we do tell you is this: Adopting another dog is not a betrayal of your departed companion.. It is honouring his memory. It is to continue to love as he taught you.
The decision that no one wants to make but is the most loving one
After 22 years of accompanying animals and families, we have learned something fundamental:
Euthanasia in time is not surrender. It is a gift.
It is giving your dog the possibility of leaving without extreme suffering. It is to give him dignity. It is to give him peace.
It is to say to him: "I have loved you so much that I am willing to break my heart for you, so that you will not have to suffer another day".
That is not cowardice. It is the purest love there is.
How to prepare for the moment (if anyone can prepare)
There is no way to be completely prepared. But there are things you can do to make that time as peaceful as possible for your dog:
Before the moment:
- Talk to your family: Make sure everyone is in agreement and everyone can be present if they wish.
- Choose the place: At home where your dog feels safe, or in our fully serviced facilities? Both options are valid.
- Write a letter: It sounds silly, but writing a goodbye letter to your dog helps process emotions. You don't have to read it to him, but it helps.
- Prepare your favourite day: His favourite food (even if he doesn't eat it), his favourite blanket, his favourite toy. Everything that made him happy.
During the moment:
- Stroke it constantly
- Speak to him in a calm voice (even if you are broken inside, try to keep your voice calm).
- Tell him everything you need to tell him: How much you love him, what he has meant to you, thank you for all the years together.
- Stay until the end
After the moment:
- Take your time with him: There is no rush. Say goodbye as long as you need to.
- Let us help you: We take care of everything with the utmost respect.
- Don't judge yourself by how you feel: Crying is normal. Being broken is normal. To feel relief is also normal.
- Seek support: Our Bereavement Unit is here for you.
When that time comes, you will not be alone
At FuneralVet we are not a cold, corporate service. We are Yilenia and Azucena, two women who have been exactly where you are now.
We have mourned the loss of our own colleagues. We have felt that absurd guilt of "am I doing the right thing? We have had sleepless nights wondering if there was more we could have done.
That's why we created FuneralVet. So that no family feels alone at the most difficult time.
What we offer:
✅ Accompaniment before the decision: We can talk to you, assess your dog, help you see the signs clearly.
✅ Dignified euthanasia service: In our 365m² facilities in Estepona or in the comfort of your own home.
✅ Private farewell room: With ambient music, soft lighting, as long as you need.
✅ Professional Thanatoaesthetics: We arrange your partner with love to make your last memory a beautiful one.
✅ Individual cremation guaranteed: You only receive your dog's ashes, with an official certificate.
✅ Psychological support: With professionals specialised in animal grief. Because your grief is real and needs to be validated.
✅ 24/7 availability: Pain does not understand timetables. Neither do we.
Find out how we can help you →
The truth that nobody tells you but we do
It will never be the perfect moment.
There will always be a part of you that thinks "what if he holds on a little longer? There will always be guilt. It will always hurt.
But when you see your dog free of pain, resting in peace, you will know you did the right thing.
The most difficult decision is sometimes the most loving.
Your dog gave you years of unconditional love. Of joy on grey days. Of comfort when no one else understood. Of unconditional loyalty.
Now it is your turn to give him the last gift: a dignified death, without suffering, surrounded by the love you always gave him.
When you're ready to talk, we'll be here
You don't have to make this decision alone. You do not have to carry this responsibility alone.
We are professionals with 22 years of experience, but we are also human beings who have been through what you have been through.
We can help you.
📞 Call us when you need it:
- Telephone: +34 611 113 649 | +34 951 547 240
- WhatsApp: Talk to us now
- Email: info@funeralvet.com
🏥 Visit us: Calle Graham Bell Nº6, Estepona (Málaga)
🕐 Available 24/7 Because pain doesn't wait, and neither do we.
